Funny Kid Jokes
Topping the list of jokes that bring the house down? Kid jokes. Whether you’re a kid, a parent, or just someone with a kid-size sense of humor, here are 101 of the funniest kid jokes you and your family can enjoy.
What Is a Joke?
A joke is a one-liner, a pun, or a clever remark that’s used to evoke laughter. Kid jokes deal specifically with topics and situations that kids can relate to and find humorous.
Types of Funny Kid Jokes
Funny kid jokes come in different varieties, such as:
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One-Liners: Short puns and jokes delivered as a single statement.
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Questions: These can range from silly questions like “Why did the chicken cross the playground?” to riddle-style jokes like “What has four legs and one arm?”
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Knock-Knock: Characterized by a switch in the punchline, for instance “Knock, knock. Who’s there? Banana. Banana who? Knock, knock. Who’s there? Banana.
Why Are Kid Jokes So Funny?
Kid jokes are popular because they often feature imaginative, surreal, and even silly puns and scenarios that kids enjoy. They’re also fun because they often have an unexpected punch line that surprises and delights the audience. Plus, they typically have easy-to-follow jokes that are often short and compact, making them great for singing, learning, and reciting.
Best Silly, Corny, and Bad Kid Jokes
Many of the funniest jokes are corny, bad, or just plain silly. Here are some of the funniest kid jokes for little ones and big ones alike:
- What did the fish say when he hit the wall? Dam.
- Why did the firefighter go to the dentist? To get his teeth capped.
- What did the policeman say to his belly button? You’re under a vest!
- What did the ocean say to the sailboat? Nothing, it just waved.
- What did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt!
- Why did the bee go to the doctor? Because he had hives.
- What did the judge say to the skunk? Odor in the court!
- Where do ducks go to get haircuts? The quack barber!
- How do astronauts enter a spaceship? They use a rocket door.
- What did the bear say when he stepped on the hot coal? Yowch!
Best Animal Jokes for Kids
Animals are a favorite topic of kids, so here are some of the funniest animal jokes to tickle the funny bone of kids of all ages:
- What did the elephant say to the naked man? How do you breathe through that thing?
- What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator.
- What did the fish say when he hit the wall? Dam.
- Why do seagulls live by the sea? Because if they lived by the bay, they’d be bagels!
- Why did the chicken go to the séance? To get to the other side.
- What did the pig say at the beach on a hot summer’s day? I’m bacon!
- What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, it just waved.
- Why did the whale cross the ocean? To get to the other tide.
- What did the fish say when it hit the wall? Dam!
- How do you catch a unique rabbit? Unique up on him.
Best School Jokes for Kids
School can be drag, so here are some of the funniest school jokes to liven up the classroom:
- What did the pencil say to the other pencil? I’m getting sharper!
- How did the math book feel when it saw the other math book? It was very attracted.
- What did the howling wind say to the science class? I’m buoyant!
- Why did the science teacher go to the bar? To get a stopper for the flask!
- What did the algebra book say to the geometry book? Don’t be a an-gle!
- What did the calculator say to the math student? You can count on me!
- How did the geometry book feel when it saw the other geometry book? It was very attracted.
- What did the chalkboard say to the students? It’s time to think outside the box!
- Why don’t scientists like shopping? Because they don’t like test tubes!
- What did the math book say to the other math book? I’m getting sharpener!
Best Food Jokes for Kids
Here are the funniest food jokes sure to bring a smile to the faces of any dining hall:
- What do you call a talking muffin? A parrot-tart!
- What did the grape do when it got stepped on? It let out a little wine!
- How do you organize a space party? You planet!
- What does a cookie say when it gets stepped on? Crumbs!
- Why did the cupcake go to the dentist? To get a little filling!
- What did the tomato say to the other tomato? Lookin’ a little squishy, aren’t ya?
- What did the cheese say when it looked in the mirror? Halloumi!
- What did the banana do when it saw the doctor? It went ape!
- Why did the jellybean go to the dentist? To get a little tooth ache.
- What did the corn say when the farmer picked it? Cob ya later!
Best Sports Jokes for Kids
Athletic types will love this list of the funniest sports jokes:
- What did the baseball glove say to the baseball? Catch ya later!
- What did the basketball say to the soccer ball? I’m into field goals!
- What did the jump rope say to the other jump rope? I’m double dutching!
- What did the volleyball say to the basketball? Nothing, it just set it up!
- Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one!
- What did the football coach say to his players? Let’s get ready to fumble!
- Why did the soccer player bring rope to the game? He was the goalie!
- What did the basketball player say when he made a shot? Swish!
- What did the tennis player say when she won a match? Game, set, match!
- What did the baseball player say when he struck out? Oh well, next batter.
Funniest Kid Jokes from Movies
Catch some of the funniest kid jokes from famous movies:
- From Monsters, Inc.:
Sulley: What’s two plus two?
Mike: Uh…four?
Sulley: Four. That’s why I like you, Mike. You’re not afraid to make the tough decisions. - From Despicable Me:
Gru: It’s so fluffy, I’m gonna die! - From Finding Nemo:
Dory: Fish are friends, not food. - From Shrek:
Donkey: For your information, there’s a lot more to ogres than people think. - From The Incredibles:
Edna Mode: No capes! - From Monsters University:
Randall: I heard the Dean was in a band!
Mike: Are you serious?
Randall: No, but I did hear that she was in a steak! - From Toy Story:
Woody: Reach for the sky! - From Frozen:
Kristoff: Some people are worth melting for. - From Ratatouille:
Ego: I don’t like food. I love it - From Megamind:
Megamind: You be careful. You don’t want to get yourself kicked out of kindergarten.
Best Clean Jokes for Kids
Some of the funniest kid jokes are also the cleanest. Here are the best clean kid jokes that your little ones will love without any worry:
- What did the 0 say to the 8? Nice belt.
- How do you keep a elephant from charging? Take away its credit card.
- What did the fish say when it swam into the wall? Damn.
- Why don’t shrimp share their toys? Because they’re shellfish.
- What did the grape do when he got stepped on? He let out a little wine.
- What did the hot dog say when it was served at the baseball game? Play ball!